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A 17-year-old boy who adores his mum's steak and kidney pudding,
wants to be a carpenter. His mother strongly disagrees with
his career choice, and the arguments begin. They can't agree and
won't compromise. They are unable see past their escalating differences.
She forces her son to leave their house. The boy is homeless, and
must search for solutions.
From the Homeless Persons Unit, the boy is referred to Joelle
Kenny, a Family Mediation Worker for West London YMCA. As luck
would have it, Joelle had just stumbled upon a weeklong holiday
adventure in the Lake District, and decides it would be a good opportunity
for this boy.
While he is away, Joelle contacts his mother and they have conversations
that lead the mum to new perspectives of understanding. The
boy comes back from the encouraging holiday with a positive attitude,
and with Joelle's help and mediation, the boy is eventually welcomed
home. A week later, the boy happily tells Joelle that his mum
had cooked steak and kidney pudding for him, something she hadn't
done in a long time…
This is one of many stories from the work Joelle Kenny does
within West London YMCA. The aim of the service she provides
is to help young people who have been evicted from their family
home in the area of Hammersmith and Fulham. Clients are referred
to Joelle, who sets up an appointment with the young person to discuss
the issues surrounding their homelessness, and the parent/carer
is also contacted for both parties to attempt reconciliation.
In each mediation session, Joelle creates a space for the young
person to speak at length and the parent is encouraged to listen
and not interrupt. Joelle encourages voices to be heard by creating
a "solution focused" mediation where she encourages
her clients to focus on positive steps towards the future.
Joelle has been mediating since February 2003, and in that one year
she has seen 133 young people.
"I have never heard my son speak like that before…I
can now better understand my son," is the sentiment often
expressed by parents after a mediation session.
Like this one boy's story, Joelle has helped many families reconcile
their differences. Out of 33 cases, where there was cooperation
and there was nothing to suggest that it would not be in the best
interest of the young person to be reconciled with the family, 91
% were permitted to return home.
From accompanying a young person on a bus for an appointment to
simply providing a listening ear, these successful stories are due
to Joelle taking the extra step. The stories of the people she comes
in contact with are often challenging.
Joelle recalls one case in particular with a daughter and mother
involving several serious issues such as "death, grief, and
violence" where she felt much of the situation seemed irreconcilable.
As a committed Christian, Joelle often turns to prayer for the
people she works with.
"God does lay these young people on my heart" she
commented as she described her prayer for this particular family.
The next day, she said, things were calmer, and she felt that the
situation wasn't hopeless; it wasn't impossible because of God's
involvement.
Joelle has hopes of reaching out in the future to schools and providing
work that deals with early homelessness intervention, but for the
moment she continues to work within the stories of steak and kidney
pudding that make a working day at the YMCA worthwhile.
Joelle Kenny
Mediation Worker
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